It seemed like a good idea at the time, but my mom was a little less favorable of me throwing my education into the metaphorical toilet, and didn’t allow me to go through with it.  Unfortunately for her, she didn’t foresee the very near future where I threatened my high school counselor with a paperweight and managed to get kicked out anyway.  I can still see that paperweight.  It was some sort of tribal/African artifact type of thingumabob.  It was designed to look like wood, but it was in fact, stone.  Which probably made me seem all the more threatening.  You don’t mess with a fishnet clad, dark red-lip-stick’d gothball (Robert Smith, much?) holding a slab of stone in the shape of a Tiki head.  I will fuck you up(noIwon’t).

I spent some time in an alternative school, which I eventually dropped out of.  I poke fun, but those days were full of hardship.  I chose to deal with them by dying the shit out of my hair and researching body modification in world culture.  And when that bored me, I turned to role playing on the internet.  Because on the internet, I could be a goddamn cat person.  Yeah, that’s right, I role played a cat person.  I’m not ashamed of this(yesIam).

Role playing served as a means of escape.  A way I could express my creativity (or something), and at least pass the time.  I role played in AOL chatrooms mostly.  I can’t even remember what compelled me to try it.  I think I simply stumbled into the Red Dragon Inn one day and thought, “OH COOL ELVES AND SHIT.  I CAN ROLE PLAY TOO.”

::She entered the room, her cool, amber eyes scanning the bar occupants.  She wore all black, which matched her raven hued locks, which cascaded down to the small of her back.  Two perky cat ears peek out from her bouncy tresses, picking up the conversation of drunks and hooligans around the vicinity.::

Aww yeah.  This is good.  

The way I decided to enter the world of role play is to simply be dramatic as possible.

 First off, I need an awesome celebrity picture to depict my character.  Let’s see now….

PERFECT.

Now I just need to photoshop on some cat eyes, and I will have my character.  I will name her Sierra, because it’s close to my real name and sounds exotic and cool.  Man, I am totally not uncool.

I couldn’t actually find the exact picture I used for my character.  I remember it was another photo of Katie Holmes, in a similar, dramatic pose, Dawson’s Creek era.  At the time, everyone in the chatroom I played with had celebrity photos to portray their characters.  Because of this, everyone was obscenely good looking and completely unrealistic.  Why?  Because how can your character hook up with another character if he or she isn’t obscenely good looking?

Alright, now I need to edit the shit out of my AOL profile and make it all dramatic and MEANINGFUL.  I’ll just use some HTML and write a POEM in there or something.  …No wait, not a poem.  SONG LYRICS.  SONG LYRICS ARE COOL.

Looking back on my methods of character development and my writing style, I have to admit to myself.  I was pretty absurd.  But I was completely engaged in this virtual world.

Early on, it was hard to determine genuine role players from absolute creepers.  Within the first few days of role play, I experienced someone who just wanted to “cyber.”  It started out all innocent, sure.  And then you get posts like this:

::Raoul grasps the back of Sierra’s hair and tugs lightly.  Then he starts unsnapping her bra…::–

((HEY HEY HEY WAIT A FUCKING SECOND THERE SLEEZEBALL.  GO BACK TO YOUR FREAKY SEX CHATROOMS OR SOMETHING))*

*X’s out of the chat*

However, the more I role played, the more I loved it, and the more I could seriously give a shit about anything else.  I have incredibly fond memories of story-lines my group and I created.   It even got to the point where more characters were more popular than each-other, and thus spawned mun** drama.  Now that I am reflecting on this, I remember more mun drama than legitimate story lines.  Who was dating who?  Who cybered with who?  Did so and so kill blah de blah’s character again?  Why is the story line halted?  Why is Joe-schmoe mad at Jane Doe?  WHY CAN I NOT FIND A BETTER CHARACTER PORTRAIT?  TAKE BETTER PICTURES, KATIE HOLMES.

In my early twenties, I felt my role play life slowly coming to an end.  I had acquired something called a boyfriend, and my naive virgin mind wanted to experience.. eh.. other things.  Not cyber things.  Admittedly, I can say that my online days were more enjoyable than that particular relationship, but let’s not lose focus here.

Every now and then I create a minor character and role play with him or her.  There is just something so nostalgic, so whimsical, so fantastical, about role playing.  When things weren’t going to so hot in IRL, I knew I could rely on my virtual playground to distract me, and engage me until things got better.  I often wish I could go back to AOL chatroom role play, but AOL days are pretty much dead.  People are using AOL disks/discs as cup holders these days anyway.  But for a time in my life, I truly adored it.  I await the day that Sierra, the quirky cat girl with beige fur on her ears will make a triumphant return.

*((Talking with parenthesis around the sentence, like this, meant we were talking out of character.  In character statements usually had :: :: around them, to specify action.))

**Mun is the term we used to call the person playing the character.  Sometimes meaning, “Man Under Name”, it was common to call person by their character name followed by “mun.”  I would be “Sierra-mun.”

So, as many of you have already figured out, I love computers. I had been scouting sites like Craig’s List and eBay for older computers that ran earlier versions of Dos, that still functioned properly. Preferably, I wanted a system I could play my old floppy diskettes on, and legitimately play Dos games and maybe incorporate the system into my videos. After much scouring, I found that these systems tend to be very expensive. It makes sense, finding an older system in mint condition is no easy task. In some ways, finding old systems like computers from the early 80s is more difficult than game console collecting. Consoles like Nintendo, Atari..you can still find those if you really wanted one. Finding an old computer that someone hasn’t scrapped proved to be a challenge for me, especially since I am usually on a tight financial rope, so to speak.

And then, a miracle happened!

Completely by fluke, I found this gem in my room mate’s grandpa’s house. It was just sitting there like an old relic, in absolutely beautiful condition. Meet BILL, the old, crotchety IBM-PC!

Get away from me, you young whipperschnappers.

Beautiful, right? The guy who gave it to me seemed to be surprised that I wanted it. Bill works perfectly, and is in pristine condition. Bill is an IBM-PC 5150 with a 8088 processor. He has two 5.25 inch floppy drives, A and B. There is no hard drive. It runs Dos 3.1, and runs at 4MHz. I am unsure on the ram at the moment, but it is somewhere between 64k and 256K.

This system is quite historic! IBM asked a small company named Microsoft to write the OS for this system. Bill Gates bought the rights to QDos (Quick and Dirty Operating System, you may recall hearing about this in my DosBox video) and modified it to create PC-Dos (later, MS-Dos) for this model. It also came with a higher end monitor which displays CGA graphics. This system was made in 1981, making Bill 30 years old. Originally, this model, when it came out, would have ran someone $3005. Which by today’s standards, is about $7200. If you search for this system, it still runs about 700-800 dollars. I am very lucky to have gotten mine for free, otherwise Bill would have been sent to the scrap yard.  I named him after my late father, even though my father wasn’t very crotchety.  Bill, I assume, is up there in years and is very grumpy.  His floppy disk drive makes distinctively cranky noises.

Running Reader Rabbit

I don’t have many 5.25 floppies hanging around, however, I plan to invest on getting it a 3.5 inch floppy drive so I can write some of my old games onto 5.25 floppies, and run them.  I did happen to have Reader Rabbit lying around, so I popped that into the B drive, and it worked perfectly.  Oh, the CGA glory!  How I love thee, purple, cyan, white and black!

If anyone has any 5.25 inch floppy disks they might want to get rid of, please let me know and I will gladly take them off your hands!

Bill is a wonderful find and I couldn’t be more excited.  The best way to find old systems is to ask older family members if they had a system and kept one.  Look around, and you might be able to score one for free!

More information on Bill as me and my room mate mess around with him.  Hopefully, I will be able to run King’s Quest 3 on it and relive my childhood.

It came with Doom. It was so cool.

I decided my new computer was amazing. I loved it. It could play games, I could write papers on it, it had Windows 3.1, which I was personally amazed by because previously, I had been using DOS computers, AND it had that RADICAL MS-Paint program that I could paint really stupid portraits of myself in. COOOOOOOOL.

In my amazement, I decided to write a paper on my new toy. It was for either 2nd or 3rd grade if I recall correctly. I don’t remember the exact time, I just have the visual in my head of reading my paper out loud to the class. The subject of the paper was to be “The best thing I received for Christmas.” So I wrote this completely in depth paper about my computer. How it had Windows 3.1. How it had a CD-ROM. How soundblaster was new, and that my games could talk. I was a very passionate 8 year old.

I spoke my words proudly and eagerly. And when I was done, the clique of snobby girls sitting diagonal from me laughed. And then I realized that I had ostracized myself from my fellow students for the rest of the year. And even the rest of my time spent in elementary school. Being a “nerd” or any form of “computer geek” was the worst thing you could be when I was growing up. It wasn’t accepted as being cool like it is today. No, when I was growing up, my friends of the female persuasion would rather involve themselves in the exciting, fast paced worlds of boy bands. And jewelry. And sometimes shoes. I hate shoes. Eventually I got tired being a nerd and ran amuck through my high school years, resulting in me getting thrown out of public school. ….But that is really a story for another day. *coughISortOfThreatenedThePrincipalcough*

It blows my mind that “nerdy” things have become such a trendy thing. Now we have websites devoted to selling geek swag. It’s COOL to be a nerd. You WANT to know about things like Star Wars, Back to the Future, Computers, iPhones, programming. Man, I’m COOL now. And because I actually teach students technology based subjects at my job, I’m even MORE COOL. Students depend on me because I have the upper hand. I HAVE POWER. ….sorry.

But then I thought, is being a nerd cool because people actually find it cool? Or is it more of a matter that technology has become so useful, that people depend on nerds? I teach students of all ages and from all kinds of different backgrounds. I constantly get young girls coming in with their iPhone. Young, teenage girls who are fresh out of high school, and honestly don’t have a clue, and for the most part are required to take *some* form of computer course just to complete their core. These girls do not care about learning the computer. But they DO care that their iPhone is working properly, so they depend on us computer dorks, programmers, and hardware gurus to make their everyday accessories work. Now, for the most part, I get students who love learning. But every now and then I get those bratty, spoiled types who could care less about what they have the opportunity to learn. Apathetic as they are, they are not like the girls who made fun of me in elementary school. They respect people who have the upper hand.

I think another reason being a nerd has become so accepting over the last 15 years or so, is the fact that video games have become more popular than ever. And good video games require good programmers, good designers, good artists, and because games have become so lush and cinematic over time, it’s something everyone can get into. Unless you are one of those gals who break their boyfriends PS3s in a giant butthurt fit then uploads it on youtube. Man, I hate that.

I remember being young and being ridiculed for liking the computer games that I played. Now I hop online, claim to like video games, and all of a sudden I am some hot commodity for having girl parts, and enjoying games. It’s absolutely insane the way things have changed. It’s pretty nice not having to worry about getting picked on for having been a huge nerd in the past. I mean, that’s what my obsession with the Monkees is for. Pick on that, for cripes sake.

Some things never change, however. The other day I taught a girl who wore pants that read “juicy” on the butt. I was teaching her Microsoft Excel. She didn’t understand something, so she just outright laughed and called it stupid. Nobody laughed with her.

Every one of the producers I met at Magfest are amazing.  I will be the first to admit; I don’t watch everyone’s videos.  I really try to, but time is very little and there are so many of us, it’s hard to keep track.  I can say that I fully support all my fellow producers, whether I find time to watch them or not, because every single one of them are amiable, caring people who I feel privileged to have met.  I felt like I had made a solid group of friends at Magfest, and I will always look back at these memories fondly.  I also became very close to someone special over my trip.  I cherish that friendship, and want that person to know how appreciative I really am.

The fans were AWESOME.  I consider myself pretty low on the totem poll when it comes to being at Channel Awesome, and I am fine with it.  I put up my videos, I interact with people… it’s nice.  Can’t ask for more.  So imagine my astonishment whenever I was mobbed by fans.  It was very very flattering, and everyone who approached me was pleasant to talk to (even though some of you talked my ear off!)  I can’t tell you how surprising and weird it is to have people come up to you and recognize who you are.  I loved meeting you guys!

And now, randoms!:

I won two video game challenges.  Did I mention that?  Yeah, I’m pretty awesome that way.

There was a band named “Arc Impulse” playing by the panel rooms.  They were swell, and did some lovely renditions of some of the Zelda songs.

ELEVATOR PARTY.

I bought some home made Tails (of Sonic the Hedgehog) earrings from one of the vendors.  They are amazing.

I feel asleep on LordKat.  He’s comfy!

Welshy is one of the most charming males I’ve ever met.

Nash has very pretty hair.

Linkara likes to throw marshmallows at people.  I don’t know why.

That drumming game in the console room was way too much fun for it’s own good.

Thanks to TheGamingGoose for giving me a cheesetastic yet WONDERFUL FMV game that stars TIM CURRY.

I schooled Paw at the Michael Jackson Experience.

Oi!

All in all, had a blast.  I can’t wait to go next year and do this all over again! (Preferably without getting stuck in the elevator next time.)

The robots I like are a bit more fictitious, but I love them all the same.  I’ve always loved robots and ‘droids, so here’s a list of my personal favorites.

TOP TEN LISTS, ALL THE TIME TOP TEN LISTS.

**HONORABLE MENTION** Burton (The Spoony Experiment)

Burton is the robot from Internet Famous Reviewer and personality, Noah Antwiler.   He is clearly an homage to the robots from Mystery Science Theater 3000, and it definitely does justice.  Burton is amazing for a home made robot, able to move his head and open his mouth.  Not only functional, but Burton is one of the more aesthetically pleasing machines.  Nice blue color, attractive dust buster for a head, and red hands.  RED.

10. Bender (Futurama)

Typically, I don’t like beer guzzling, foul mouthed, chauvinistic pigs.  But when these kind of personalities are fused with a robot, the combination is pure win.  Snarky, obscene, and strikes an uncanny resemblance to Homer Simpson.  Bender is one of the most distinguishable characters within the adult cartoon circuit.  Regardless of how filthy and cunning he is, I do like this character.  There’s something awesome about a completely brash robot, since most of the robots on my list have a friendly nature.

9. The Iron Giant

I don’t know much about the novel, but I love the depiction in the Iron Giant animated feature film.  Talk about a 180, going from the crude personality of Bender to the gentle personality of this character.   I can’t imagine a better “pet” than a huge metal man.  I am very jealous of Hogarth.  The movie itself has a very touching ending, that I won’t give away of course, but I will say The Iron Giant is one of the best robotic heros ever conceived.

8. Rosie (The Jetsons)

If you grew up on the cartoon network like I did in the early 90s, then you must be familiar with Rosie.  We share a nickname!  The Jetsons was one of my absolute favorite cartoons growing up.  I felt they were always in battle with The Flintstones, even though they probably were not due to the times they were created, but regardless, I was on The Jetsons side.  Rosie was a staple in my childhood, and the Jetsons was one of the first shows I experienced with a prominent robot character, so I look at her fondly.

7. ROB (Nintendo)

You may be asking me “Why??”  BECAUSE HE IS CUTE.  LOOK AT HIM.

6. The Terminator

The Terminator is interesting due to the fact he played a bad guy, but also a good guy.  Not too mention, it’s fuckin’ AHNOLD.  How can you not like the Govenator?  Judgement Day was one of the movies that changed my tastes on films, and I went from watching really kiddy stuff to more dramatic, impressive films like the Terminator series.  We don’t *typically* think about robots as huge muscular men with Austrian accents, so this is a bit different from your fantasy robot.  I like it.

5. R2D2 (Star Wars)

Most possibly one of the cutest robots of all time, R2D2 proves himself to be a smartass without even using English words.  As a child, I *loved* watching R2D2 argue (and win) with his mechanical partner, C3P0.  He looks sort of like a cross between a trash can, and segway.  And hey, there ain’t nothin’ wrong with that.

4. Number 5 (Short Circuit)

Short Circuit.  What can I say?  It’s a fun, cheesy flick with Steve Gutenberg about a potentially dangerous robot gone good.  He can be annoying to some, but I think his voice is rather cute, and with all that input, he may just be the smartest robot out there.  Self learning, charming, and clearly a capable dancer, I would date this machine.

3. Robo (Chrono Trigger)

Playing through Chrono Trigger is one of the most amazing game experiences I’ve ever had, and I always made sure that Robo was in my team as much as possible.  His story is compelling, and I enjoyed his side quests more than the other side quests.  I know I am not alone in wanting Lucca and Robo to hook up…right?  …..Right??

2. WD40 (Space Quest)

Maybe an more obscure choice, but Space Quest 5 is one of my favorite games of all time.  Wd40 is the female equivalent of The Terminator.  She starts out as evil and wanting to rip out your voice box, but joins your side after…well, blowing her up.  Easy to persuade…?  WD40 is also hot, IN robot form.  Pretty hard to make circuits and panels of metal sexy.

1. Andy (Bicentennial Man)

I know I will get slammed for this, but my number one choice for my top ten robots is Andy, from the movie Bicentennial Man.  This movie is so sincere, and really brings to life my true fantasy- a robot that has human emotions.  Andy starts out a robot who realizes he is different, in that he has feelings.  In order to experience life to the fullest, he undergoes an amazing transformation in which he becomes a human through means of artificial organs, and skin.  It really hits a chord with me, even in its cheesiness, and I find myself yearning for a coin-operated boy of my own.  The movie and character does a really nice job of merging fantasy with reality, and let’s face it:  We all need a little fantasy in our reality.  If you haven’t seen it, I recommend it.

And there we have it!  My list of the top robots of all time.  Everything is my own personal opinion of course, and so as not to get slammed by the hardcore Transformers fans, I would like to give a nod to Optimus Prime.   Even though I don’t see any robots in transformers.  Just trucks.  …..>;)