First of all, this painting by Renoir.  I *love* this painting.  Now, I never had a great relationship with my mother.  It is what it is, basically.  We love each other, and sometimes we see eye to eye, but for the most part, we like to keep a healthy distance.  This painting, however, sends me back in time to when I was a little girl and my mom was my best friend.  The painting isn’t so much some brush strokes on a canvas as it is a snapshot of when things were less dramatic.
Plus, it’s damned pretty.

I have to admit…those little girls eyes stare right into your soul, BURNING your BRAIN with her demonic little girl orbs of sizzling EVIL and — eh?  Oh.  Sorry.

Little girls just make everything more creepy.  ….Why did I want this painting again?  Or, right, the completely sincere excerpt I wrote not two minutes ago.  My bad.

I want a domesticated fox.   Wondering what to get me for Christmas?   Think I’m a tough buy?  Well I have solved all of those issues by asking for a pet fox.

How can you possibly resist that!?!  Foxes of any breed have got to be one of the cutest animals on the planet (right next to moose.  They’re so dopey).  If I get one, I could name it Tails! Because I am not completely lame and unoriginal like that.  I really don’t have much more to say on that matter.  I would probably be just as thrilled with a puppy, to be honest.  Any kind of cuddly animal thing I can cuddle at night would be great.  (Please don’t dress up as a fox and offer to cuddle me.  I’ll know the difference.)

I also want A LOVER WHO WON’T DRIVE ME CRAZY! Some girl who knows the meaning of ah- HEY HIT THE HIIIGHWAY!

….Dear god, did I just quote John Mellencamp?  …I……I’m sorry.  I don’t know what came over me, there.
To be completely honest, I’ve been wondering a lot about the concept of “open relationships”, and how they suit peoples life styles.  The fact of the matter is, I have become utterly too independent for my own good.  Not saying this is a bad thing (ALL THE WOMEN WHO ARE INDEPENDENT, THROW YOUR HANDS UP AT MEEEH), because independence and taking care of yourself is very important.  I enjoy being a loner type, not needing a relationship, paying for my own dinner (well, maybe not paying for my own dinner so much..) and spending a nice quiet evening on my couch playing some forgotten tome of a game.  On the other side of the fence we have my desire for….uh…physical relations.  And why not?  Sex drives us much like food and work drives us.  A completely human need.  It’s fairly hard for me to simply sleep with someone I don’t know anything about of course.  For me, physical appearance only comes into play AFTER I’ve been exposed to their personality.  If I’m not attracted to that, chances are physical attraction isn’t going to happen.  Unless you are Daryl Hall.  I don’t know him, but I love him.

….Daryl…..

*Cough* Anyways.  Open relationships never appealed to me directly, but in my own struggles with the idea of relationships, being tied down, and wanting affection without commitment, I can understand WHY they appeal to others.  I can’t quite grasp how people can maintain calm composure, and not feel pangs of jealousy throughout the situation.  Maybe people hide those to avoid messy confrontation with whoever they are dating.  Maybe I am over analyzing the idea, but I am curious about other people’s experiences.  If you’ve had experience with open relationships, leave a comment in the comment box, and even if you haven’t, what’s your theory on them?  Why or why don’t they work?

You know, I think what I really want is to just go out to dinner.  All this thinking about shit I want is making me hungry.  Time for some left over chili, baby!  With oyster crackers.  WERD.

Well, being a single white girl from the suburbs, I couldn’t think of a better way to celebrate Halloween than drowning myself in bite sized Hershey chocolates and watching Shaun of the Dead.    I had anticipated seeing some cute costumed children approach the house, but Halloween just isn’t the same these days.  So far, I’ve gotten maybe 2 groups of kids.  One group of kids passed by the house and actually said, “No! Not that house! Let’s go to this house…”

It’s like they know I am hoarding all the chocolate to myself and cheaped out by only buying warheads to give out.  I’m sorry, but when you wait until the day OF Halloween to buy candy, there are few options.  And by few options, I mean they seriously only had Warheads.  Sorry.

Single and unpopular like Yours Truly?   Here are some things you can do on Halloween that may or may not entertain you.

• Scare some kids. You know, I’ve always got a kick out of those people who dress up as Jason or something and stand all statue-y outside their house…then they come up at you and scare the bejeezus out of you cause you’re a wuss.  I’m not speaking from experience or anything.  I mean.  I’m not easily sca–HOLY SHIT A CENTIPEDE.
• Watch Rocky Horror Picture Show ALL DAY LONG.  Because it’s on ALL DAY LONG.  Shaun of the Dead is also on several times today, so take your pick of stereotypical Halloween movies.
• Dress up anyway! I am being serious, it’s always fun dressing up.  But be forewarned, if you dress up as Elton John, kids will be confused.  Actually, I think dressing up as Elton John may scare kids more than the typical werewolf costume these days.
• Make taco spaghetti. I actually don’t have a good Halloween related reason for this, it’s just delicious.   It also provides your carb intake for the next 5 years.
• Eat pudding. For dessert after the taco spaghetti.
• Play a scary game. I will be the first to admit that Horror games do scare the shit out of me.  I usually have to play them with another person, because if the game is genuinely terrifying, I become paralyzed and can’t even interact with it.  I will literally pass the keyboard (or controller depending on the console) to the next person.  There is something legitimately more scary than playing a game, than watching a scary movie.  It’s also a nice adrenaline rush though, and what better time of the year to induce wetting yourself with a scary game than now?  I recommend the Trilby Series.  Simple graphics, serious mindfuck.

You could also spend your time writing a pointless blog to make the day go by.  Kind of like how I am doing here.  Now, excuse me, me and my bowl of chocolate have a date.  OOOOMNOMNOM.

Edit:  Sorry, I must add this because it’s adorable.  I just answered some trick or treaters, and one of them handed me a generic newspaper we usually leave on the porch.  Then she picked up the other ratty, decrepit papers that have been sitting there for months and handed them to me saying, “You missed a lot of mail!”